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Bo's Journey Home - Chapter 14   Sunday, 8:00 PM Nora tried the rest of Friday and all day Saturday to reach Bo with no luck. Even Gabrielle was exasperated after Nora’s 20th call on Saturday. Nora had stopped trying sometime Saturday night and had given up on Bo calling her back. She was so furious with him; he wouldn’t know what hit him when she saw him in the morning at work. She headed up to her room. She stopped in front of her son’s partially closed bedroom door. She exhaled deeply to release the fury she had over Bo ignoring her calls. She then knocked quietly on her son’s door, pushing it in slightly. He was sitting in the window well, his head against the glass. “Why wouldn’t he talk to her?" she wondered. "And what exactly happened between him and Bo?” She called to him softly. “Matthew?” He looked to her slowly. She smiled at him. “Time for bed, back to day camp tomorrow.”   Matthew frowned a bit. “Can’t I just stay home with Maryann?”   As much as she would have like to have said yes, Nora shook her head. “You can’t hide from the world, buddy.”   Matthew slowly got up from where he was sitting and climbed into bed. She went to him and kissed him softly, hugging him to her, then leaving, closing the door behind her. He got up and went back to the window staring into the night.   Across town, Bo paced angrily in his office. He hadn’t left it all weekend. He had examined the sketches all weekend and had finally pieced together the last part of Matthew’s disappearance. Gabrielle. The sketch of the woman was Gabrielle. He had concentrated so much on just the finding of Matthew; that it wasn’t until he was able to look at the sketches objectively that he had figured out that Gabrielle was the woman in the sketch. She was the only other person who knew that Bo was Matthew’s father. It had to have been her. How could he have not put this all together a week ago? He knew he could not go back to the Garrett just yet. He was still so angry, he was afraid of what he might do to Gabrielle when he saw her. And he wanted absolute proof when he confronted her. He needed Matthew to confirm it for him, and Matthew wasn’t speaking to him. He heaved an angry sigh.   His desk phone rang again. He had lost count the number of times his office phone and cell phone had rung, but he hadn’t answered either. He was on ignore. If his officers needed him, he was here in the station. They all knew that. He just continually checked his messages. Most of them were from Nora. She was angry. He could tell. But he also couldn’t blame her. What was he going to tell her when she asked him about the other day? He wondered if Matthew had told her. But then he doubted it. Nora would have tracked him down for sure.   Bo went to stand at his office window, folding his arms across his chest and looking out across town in the direction of Nora’s house. Somewhere, over there, were the two people he loved most in this world. How did the three of them end up in this crazy situation? And more importantly, where was the future taking the three of them?   Holed up in his office all weekend had given him time to really think about things. Bo knew what he wanted; first, get rid of Gabrielle. Then, get Nora and Matthew; the family that should have been his 6 years ago. Now he had to figure out how to get all three of them to want the same thing. Bo knew he would have to face Nora tomorrow and she would be furious, playing prosecutor, asking him questions and demanding answers. How was he to give her any answers and keep his promise to Matthew at the same time? Damn, he should have just left with Nora and Matthew and the three of them should have talked it all out. But then, if he had, he might have lost Matthew forever.   “Damn it,” he muttered, moving from the window. He needed advice. Whenever he needed to talk to someone in the past, that someone had always been Nora. God, he missed her so much. His heart told him that. But this one thing he needed to talk to her about, he couldn’t. He had promised Matthew he wouldn’t. How could he have put himself in this position between Nora and Matthew? And now, how was he to make it right between the three of them. He needed to bounce this off someone.   He had tried reaching Clint in London, but Cord said he was out at the country house, unreachable. Cord volunteered to drive out there, but Bo assured him it was not important, just one brother missing the other. And talking to Asa about any of this was not even a consideration. “It would be great to have a mother right now,” he thought. “Yeah, I know,” he answered himself, “I have Renee. But she’s to close to Nora.” For the first time in his life, he wished he had a sister. Then he straightened up suddenly. He did have a sister. He picked up his phone and dialed the familiar number. He smiled as he spoke into the phone. “Hi, it’s Bo, you busy?” He paused, listening. “Can I come over there and see you?” He added quickly. “I need to talk.” He smiled gratefully into the phone. “Great, see you in 20 minutes.”   Bo returned his phone to its cradle, grabbed his keys from his desk and headed out. Twenty minutes later he pulled into the familiar driveway and sat for a minute, thinking back. He got out and headed to the door. He stopped and rang the doorbell, waiting. There once was a time he could just let himself in. She answered the door herself. He was leaning against the door jam, smiling slightly. “Evening, Vicki.”   Vicki returned his smile, immediately taking in his unruly appearance. “Bo, honey, why didn’t you just let yourself in?”   Bo stepped over the threshold and past her, shrugging. “I don’t live here anymore, and this is your home…”   Vicki cut him off. “Hogwash. You’re still a part of my family,” and she added softly, “and I hope I am still a part of yours.”   Bo nodded, taking both her hands in his and kissing her cheek. “Funny you should mention family.”   Vicki stopped, raising her eyebrows at him. “What did Asa do now?”   Bo laughed the first real laugh in two weeks. “No, no, no. Me coming over here has nothing to do with Asa, at least not this time.”   Vicki looked at him doubtfully. “Your phone call has had me very perplexed,” she was still holding his hands, extending them so she could get a better look at him, “and you look a bit rumpled.”   Bo released her hands and smiled at her softly. “I’m sorry, Vicki. I didn’t mean to make you worried,” he continued, explaining his “rumpled” look, “and I’ve been in these clothes since Friday.”   Vicki extended her arm towards the living room. “Come on in and tell me what has you so upset. I made some coffee after your call.”   Bo followed her into the living room. She sat on one sofa, he across from her on the other. She poured them both some coffee as he continued. “Did I say I was upset?”   Vicki’s voice was soft and caring. She looked at him intently, handing him a filled cup. “You didn’t have to, sweetheart. Your voice on the phone and now your face here in front of me speaks volumes.”   Bo smiled weakly, taking the cup and sipping from it. “You’ve know me too long.”   Vicki nodded. “And too well. So, out with it.” She asked suddenly. “Is it Matthew and Nora? Are they okay?”   He eyed her curiously. It was interesting how everyone always grouped them all together. He nodded, placing his cup down on the table. “Far as I know.”   Vicki again raised her eyebrows at him. “Far as you know? That’s an unusual answer.”   Bo frowned a bit. “It’s why I’m here.” He sighed, heavily.   Vicki was fully concerned and it came through in her voice. “Honey, what is it?”   Bo stood, moving away from the sofas and towards the terrace doors, looking out. “You know, Vicki, I always felt very comfortable living here at Llanfair. Spending time with your boys when they were little meant the world to me. Gave me a real sense of family; something I never had as a boy.”   Vicki watched him, trying to follow where he was going with his thoughts. “Clint and I loved having you live here, you know that.”   Bo turned back to face her, nodding. “Yeah, I did. Family was so important back then.”   Vicki quickly added, “And it still is.” She gave him a moment. “Bo, what is it? What’s troubling you?”   Bo voice was quiet. “I have something to tell you. I need to get this first fact out and then I’ll back track.” Vicki nodded cautiously. Bo took a deep breath and then let go of his secret. “Matthew is not Sam Rappaport’s son.” He quickly added, saying out loud words he thought he would never say again. “He’s my son,” he looked right at Vicki, “mine and Nora’s.” Vicki took a deep intake of breath, bringing her hand to her mouth. Bo acknowledged her look of shock. “Felt like that for me too, when I first found out.”   Vicki suddenly broke out into a large smile, going to him and hugging him. “Bo, that’s wonderful news. But how did all of this come about? Does Nora know?” She asked suddenly. “And more importantly, does Matthew know?”   Bo let her walk him back to the sofas. They both sat down again. “Nora found out the same time I did. As for Matthew;” And then Bo continued the story for Vicki. He told her about Sam’s letter, about Gabrielle hiding the information and then coming forward. He told her how he and Nora read the letter together, about the emotions they both felt. He told her about his and Nora’s decision to wait before telling Matthew, to allow Matthew some grieving time for Sam. And he told her about his own emotions, first when Matthew disappeared, and then when they found him, and then being in the hospital with him, the anger and sadness that illuminated from Matthew. She listened intently, with no interruptions, as he told her of his suspicions about Matthew running away, and of the incident between them on the 4th of July just confirming his suspicions. He finished his story, telling her of the promise he had made to Matthew, not to tell Nora about Matthew’s discovery, and of his own discovery that Gabrielle was one of the two people at the diner the day Matthew disappeared and was probably the one who had told Matthew. Bo was drained, having to relive all of it as he told her.   Vicki went to his sofa and sat down beside him. “Wow. That’s some story, Buchanan.”   Bo was emotionally exhausted and his small smile reflected that exhaustion. “So, here I am; the father of a child who wants nothing to do with me.”   Vicki shook her head in disagreement. “I don’t think so.”   Bo looked at her doubtful, rubbing that soreness in his neck. “Vicki, you didn’t see Matthew’s face. He was,” Bo paused and thought back to the look in Matthew’s eyes. “So hurt, so angry.”   Vicki waved her hand nonchantlantly. “That’s temporary stuff. Kids get angry and hurt with their parents at least 50 times a week. They get over it.”   Bo laughed out loud. “Maybe your kids get over it. Not mine. This father stuff is all new to me. I mean, I never really had the chance to be a real father to Drew when he was little. He came into my life as an adult. Now, I’m walking into this ready made kid, who just lost the only father he ever knew, finds out from my,” he choked on the word, “girlfriend”, he shook his head slightly, “that that man wasn’t really his father, that I am, and is now really angry with me, because he thinks I lied about it somehow.”   Vicki pointed out Bo’s brother. “Clint walked in to two ready made kids who were pretty angry about losing their father and he won them both over.”   Bo rolled his eyes at being compared to his brother. “Clint? He was born to be a father. Hell, he fathered me because Asa was so busy building his empire. He was 10 times the father than I could ever be.” He spoke softly. “Look at what I did to Drew. I signed him over to Asa when he was just this little boy. What kind of father does that?”   Vicki tried to comfort him on that thought. “You thought Becky would be married to Asa and you would still be a part of Drew’s life. How could you know Becky would take Drew and disappear?”   Bo fought her reasoning. “Even still, Vicki; Clint and Kevin and Joey and even Cord, they have a bond; a real father/son bond. Something I never had with Drew, and it doesn’t look so good with Matthew.”   Vick disagreed with him. “Different sons, different circumstances. Do you think Clint walked in here and my boys just said, sure thing, take my dad’s place.” Bo shrugged. “I guess not.”   “Of course not!” Vicki exclaimed. “He had to win them over. And you can win over Matthew, just like you won over Drew. Don’t you think for one minute that you and Drew didn’t have that father/son bond you’re talking about. Drew knew how much you loved him. He became a cop because of you. If that isn’t an example of a son’s love for his father, I don’t know what is.”   Bo was trying to control his “Drew emotions” that he normally kept buried deep inside his heart. It was getting hard talking about him with Vicki. He changed sons. “So where do I start with Matthew?”   Vicki could see the pain he was trying to control. She wanted to ease it for him. “By continuing to try and get through to Matthew.”   “Without Nora finding out?” he said sarcastically. “Yeah, right. I can’t even tell her because of the promise I made to Matthew.” He stood again, pacing. “What do you do when you’ve made a promise to your child to keep something between the two of you, to not tell his mother, and yet you know his mother is going to demand some answers. How do I resolve that?”   Vicki smiled at him playfully. “Welcome to parenting.”   Bo chuckled. “That’s it? That’s your comeback? Your parental experienced advice?”   Vicki smiled; glad to see the pained look had gone from his eyes. “Honey, you have to decide who you will hurt more by keeping this promise; Matthew, Nora,” she added at the end, “or you.”   Bo was taken back. “Me? Why me?”   She tried to explain. “Haven’t you been telling me how much you want to be a real father to Matthew?” Bo nodded. “Well, the longer you keep Nora in the dark, the longer you allow Matthew to keep hiding his feelings, the more all of you will suffer, especially you. You’re the one keeping the most secrets. Isn’t that what came between you and Nora before?” she asked quietly. Bo spoke seriously. “But I love that little boy, Vicki. I don’t want to hurt him. And I don’t want to hurt Nora, either.”   Vicki smiled slightly, tilting her head up at him. “Then I think you all ready know what you have to do.”   Bo stretched his arms above his head and then looked at his watch. “Wow, Vicki, look at the time.” He stood. “I’m sorry I kept you up so late.”   Vicki stood with him, smiling. “Its fine, honey. You know you are welcome to stay. You still have a room here.”   Bo smiled gratefully. “Thanks, Vicki, but I need to get home, shower and change,” He paused, rolling his eyes. “And see Gabrielle.”   Vicki looked at him thoughtfully. “Hmm, and what about Gabrielle?”   Bo smiled faintly. “You do know me. Gabrielle and I are over. I know that. But that’s another issue for another night. I can’t do much about her until I’ve spoken to Matthew. And since he isn’t speaking to me, I have to figure out a way to either get Gabrielle to tell me the truth, or get Matthew to speak to me.”   And Nora?” she added.   “And Nora,” he repeated. “Well…” he shrugged, looking at Vicki.   “Well what?” Vicki said to him knowingly.   Bo remembered the conversation he had with Rachel in the hospital. “It’s different now, Vicki, we’re different.”   “Of course it’s different,” Vicki agreed. “You’ve hurt each other; you’ve spent time apart; now you find out that you have a son together. But it all comes back to one thing. You two have always loved each other even if you both lost sight of that for while. And that love will get you through anything.”   Bo looked at her. “Will it, Vicki?”   Vicki chuckled. “Who are you trying to convince; me or you?” Bo shrugged again. “You do still love Nora, don’t you Bo?” she asked knowingly. He nodded slowly, looking down at the floor. “Then what’s keeping you from telling her that you still love her? Don’t you remember the discussion we had about the Buchanan’s in this family? The ones who aren’t pig-headed are bull-headed. Which did we decide you were?” she laughed.   He laughed with her. “Bull-headed, I think.”   “From what I’ve seen of you two lately, that love has brought you two back to each other; you and Nora can have the family that you always dreamed of having, if you tell her how you really feel.” Vicki suggested softly. He shrugged in agreement. “You’re right, Vicki. I do still love Nora, with all my heart. She owns my heart; that’s something I can’t deny anymore. And I will tell her. But one issue at a time, and right now, my son is my first priority. Which reminds me, not a word about Matthew and me; Nora and I still have so much to talk about…”   Vicki stopped him with a wave of her hand. “I don’t know anything.”   He kissed her check and put his arm around her as they both walked to the door. He turned and smiled at her. “I am so glad that Clint brought you into our lives. I don’t know what the Buchanans would do without this place,” he looked up and around, “without you as our anchor.”   Vicki laughed out loud and hugged him to her. “An anchor, huh?”   Bo nodded. “A port in the storm.”   Vicki hugged him tight. “You can always count on it. I’m here if you need me.”   Bo touched her cheek. “I really love having you for a sister. Thanks.”   Vicki was touched by his sentiment. “And I love having you for a brother. Congratulations on becoming a father."   "Thanks," he smiled at her and headed out the door. “Good night, Vicki.”   Vicki watched him from the door, looking up at the sky, as it changed into morning. “Good morning, Bo. And good-luck,” she whispered after him.” To be continued...