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By Your Side (Part 7)   Last time:   They got the warrant and after two hours the cops brought Eric into the station. They stopped in front of Bo. Bo just stared at him. He wanted to strangle him but he just looked into his eyes.   B: Take him to the investigation room; I’ll be there in a minute.   He walked into his office. Nora was sitting there. Nervously waiting.   B: He’s here, Red.   Nora slowly got up but she felt like her legs couldn’t carry her. She wiped her nose and walked closer to Bo.   N: Make sure he pays for what he did to me, Bo...   Bo pulled her tightly to him and held her. Then he looked deeply into her eyes and caressed her face softly.   B: I will, Red. I promise you that I will...   Bo walked out his office and headed towards the investigation room.   ******************************   He saw him sitting there and his rage raced into his body. "Calm down, Buchanan, just calm down.." he told himself as he walked closer to where Eric was sitting. They questioned him where he was that night, what he was doing, if he had an alibi..   E: Like I already said, I was alone at home. I wasn’t feeling well so I stayed at home.   B: And there is no one who can back up your words?   E: No. I only told my secretary that I wasn’t feeling well and that I was going to stay at home.   B: I see.   If only I could put my hands on him, Bo thought, this lying son of a bitch. But I have to use my mind, not my heart, he reminded to himself again. He leaned down on his hands on the table and looked deeply into Eric’s eyes.   B: Do you know Nora Buchanan?   It took Eric a moment before he answered Bo`s question. Bo examined his face, his movements and his look.   E: Yes. She was my lawyer many years ago.   B: When was the last time you saw her?   E: In my trial, before I went to prison. I haven’t seen her since then. Personally at least.   Bo looked at him suspiciously and Eric added..   E: She’s known here in Llanview, I read about her from time to time. But what does she has to do with me anyway? What do you want from me?   B: Do you hate her? She was the reason you went to jail after all..   E: You bet I do. She didn’t trust me and let me go to jail for years.   B: You were guilty..   E: She was my lawyer, she was supposed to do anything to let me free, but she didn’t.   Bo took a deep breath. His hands tightened into fists. Hank watched him carefully. Bo threw the newspapers they found in his office onto the table that separated Bo and Eric.   B: That’s the reason you have these newspapers in your office?   Eric looked carefully at the newspapers. Then he looked at Bo. He could notice the fury into his eyes.   E: I kept them so I could remind myself what I did and so I can let my anger out.   B: Let your anger out? You needed to get your anger with Nora out? So you ruined a few newspapers with her name on them? You expect me to believe that you were satisfied to ruin a few photos instead of to ruin the `object` itself?   E: I don’t know what you mean but I never hurt Nora.   Bo couldn’t take it anymore. Hearing him say Nora’s name hurt too much. Seeing the destruction of Nora’s face on these old articles made him furious. He walked closer to Eric and without controlling his feelings he put his hands on him, grabbed his shirt, caused him to get up on his feet and then shook his body. This time Bo was the one who let his anger out.   B: Nora was brutally attacked and raped; do you deny that you were the one who hurt her, you son of a bitch? Hank rushed to Bo`s side and tried to separate between them.   H: Bo, let him go..   Bo released his hands, but not before he pushed him back, causing him to fall.   E: I didn’t touch her, you’re crazy. I wish I did after what she did to me, but I didn’t..   Bo threw the cocaine they found on the table.   B: Do you expect me to believe to someone who uses drugs?   Eric stayed quiet and said nothing. Bo paced around the room. He needed to calm down before he lost his temper again. He looked at Hank, then at Eric’s lawyer and then back at Eric.   B: Take your time and think of it. I need a fresh air. You disgust me.   Bo left the room. He was so hurt and angry. He leaned against the door and tried to restrain his breaths. And then his eyes caught Nora’s eyes. He slowly stepped closer to her. He needed to hold her. He looked into her eyes and pulled her closer into his arms. Feeling his pain and anger, she wrapped her arms around him. Still embraced, he started to talk.   B: I just lost it when he said your name. I was so damn angry that it scared me. He says that he didn’t touch you. He admits that he hates you, but he says that he didn’t touch you, but he has no alibi for that night. I could smash is face off, if only I could do it.   Nora pulled back a little, so she could look at him. She couldn’t recognize all the feelings she saw on his face, but she could recognize the pain, the anger, the fury and the need to protect her and do justice for her sake.   N: Do you think we can charge him? Oh God, I wish I could be sure we have him in our hands. I’m so scared he will go free, Bo.   Bo brought his hands to her face. He softly cupped her face into his palms and gently brushed his lips against her forehead.   B: I don’t care what it takes but I’m not going to let him out of here..   Nora started to talk when they saw Hank walking out the room. He neared them. Nora examined his face carefully but she wasn’t sure what she saw in it.   H: They offered us a deal..   Bo angrily cut Hank’s sentence. A deal, he thought, you can never make a deal with the devil.   B: We are not going to make any deal with that bastard, Hank. He deserves to stay in prison for the rest of his life!   H: Bo, you know that I feel the same way, but we have to be realistic. We have nothing real against him.   Bo cut his sentence again.   B: Nothing? You saw the newspapers he was keeping. He says he has no alibi and he admits that he hates Nora, what else do you need?   Nora carefully watched Bo`s expressions and then Hank’s. She hated to admit it, but being the lawyer she knew that what Hank was saying was reasonable and true. She looked at Bo and tried to calm him down.   N: Bo, calm down, you know that Hank is right. All we have against him is circumstantial.   Bo looked into her eyes. She seemed so relax but he could see the pain and fear that were hidden deeply into heir eyes. He knew they were right, but how could he agree with that and to let him go? He looked at Hank.   B: What did they offer?   H: Considering his past, the newspapers, the fact he doesn’t have an alibi, that he admitted he hated Nora and the Cocaine they offered six years in jail.   B: What? Six years? We can’t agree, no, there is no way he gets only six years. He raped Nora, for God’s sake; I can’t believe you even consider it, Hank.   Nora said nothing but she couldn’t stay there anymore. She needed to draw away. She couldn’t control her tears anymore and let them roll down her face. She felt the same as Bo did, but she knew that Hank had no other choice. The chance they would win a trial was small and she couldn’t take the risk he would be free completely. She felt a soft touch on her shoulder and turned. Bo was standing in front of her. He hated to see her crying and suffering.   N: Hank is right, Bo. I’d rather see him in jail, even for only six years, than to see him walk away without getting punishment.   B: How can you do it? All I want is to smash his face off...   N: And all I want is to get my life back. I want to feel secured and happy. I don’t want to look over my shoulder with fear all the time. I want to have my son back. He deserves stable life, Bo. I’m going to tell Hank to sign the deal and get over with this.   Bo could say nothing. He couldn’t think of any words that could explain what he was feeling. He himself couldn’t recognize those feelings. Was it disappointment? Failure? Anger? Not long afterwards he saw his cops leading Eric, with handcuffs, to the jail cell.   He carefully watched Eric, but then his eyes caught Nora. She was standing there, tears rolled down her cheeks, watching Eric. He could see how hurt and devastated she was. And he felt responsible. Bo walked into Nora’s house and found her standing still next the window. Her arms crossed around her body, her mind drifting away. When she heard him she turned around and faced him. He couldn’t bear to look into her eyes again. Seeing the sorrow and hurt in them, made him feel guilty. He failed her. He promised her justice, but he couldn’t feel that justice was done.   N: Is something wrong, Bo?   She could notice he was avoiding her eyes contact. He was upset. And for some reason, she knew it was more than what happened earlier. He seemed upset and disappointed after she told him she was going to make that deal, but now it seemed more deeply. He was hurt.   B: No, everything is fine. Don’t worry about me. How do you feel?   He couldn’t tell her that he felt that he failed her, that he disappointed her. Was she feeling the same? He wondered when he finally had the courage to look straight into her eyes again. And if she was, would she be able to forgive me? To trust in me again? I wouldn’t bear it if she couldn’t, he thought further and wondered why it mattered to him so much.   N: I’m fine. I talked with my mother and I’m going to stay in Chicago for a few days and then to bring Matthew home.   So she did feel he failed her and she couldn’t stay near him. She lost her trust in him. He felt ashamed. Deep pain stabbed into his heart. If only he could give her the justice she needed and wanted. The one he promised he would give her but failed. So she blamed him. He could take it, but he couldn’t take the pain in her eyes. The pain he caused her. He looked around the room, avoiding her eyes again. His heart was broken. His voice was cracking.   B: I’m sorry, Nora.   She looked at him in confusion. He looked strange. And the pain that was so sharp reflected deeply into his eyes. N: Why?   B: Because I failed you. You have every reason to blame me, I understand, I really do, and I’m sorry I couldn’t do better.   N: What are you talking about, Bo? You think I blame you for what happened? God, Bo, I don’t blame you..   B: I promised you justice.   N: And you did everything you could do. I blame the law system not you. You are the last person I can blame. I know how much you care and that matters so much to me.   B: So why do you leave?   Nora looked at him in despair. How could she explain to him what she felt? She was desperate to get her life on the right track again and yet she felt she was helpless. She needed time away from all this madness. She needed to be with the people she loved the most. She needed to clear her mind out. But mostly she needed to feel secured again, away from the place that reminded her frequency what she wanted to forget. She needed to know that she could depend on herself without leaning on anyone’s shoulder, especially Bo`s, because it scared her how much she needed and wanted his support. She paced around the room, thought about her words and sat down on the couch before she started to speak.   N: I need to find myself again, Bo. I’ve been lost for too long now. I think that being at my old house can help me do it. I can’t explain you, Bo, but it has been long since I felt at home.   Home. She needed to feel at home. And he understood. It occurred to him, while she said those words, that he felt the same way. He hasn’t felt at home for a long time now. But when he thought about home, the first image he had in his mind wasn’t his childhood home, where he grew up and became the man he was, but the home he shared with the only woman he has ever loved. And it scared him. Hesitating, he neared her. The closer he got, the deeper the image of a home with Nora became. He sat beside her, still dreaded of his last thoughts and images, and looked deeply into her eyes.   B: I understand you, Nora, I wish I could help you more.   She looked into his eyes. He was disturbed. She wondered what was going on into his mind. She wanted to know what he was thinking, what he was feeling. For no understandable reason she wanted to be part of his thoughts.   N: You do help me, Bo, more than you can ever know, but I need to help myself now. I need to know that I’m strong enough and tough enough to go on. I need to believe in myself.   B: I believe in you, Nora.   His words broke her heart. She couldn’t identify if it were happiness or sadness that flooded her heart. But she knew that it meant everything to her. And before she knew it, she was crying, leaning against his body. And he didn’t speak. He just held her tight. The longer they stayed closer to each other, the more the feeling of her heart pounding against his own felt familiar. And the old desire and ache for her touch grew older and older. And she felt the same. As she continued to cry against his chest he felt the need to comfort her. He pulled away so he could look at her. Her face was down and he brought his hands to it. Softly stroking the side of her face and then he kissed her forehead. His lips lingered on her skin, burning it. The desire for her was racing inside of him now. He wanted her. His lips slowly and gently trailed down to her cheek and she responded to his touch by brushing her cheek against his. His lips against her skin ignited fire inside of her body. She needed him. The longer their touch was lingering, the more their hunger for each other grew wilder. And softly his lips met hers. Small and lingered kisses at first, turned into a passionate kiss that caused their bodies to ache for more. His hands trailed up and down her back, pulling her closer to him. Her hands held his face tightly, as if she was making sure he wouldn’t depart from her. When his hands moved to her stomach and went beneath her shirt, making contact with her bare skin, her body began to melt. The touch of his hands on her body electrified her. He leaned her back on the couch and was on top of her. His lips started to trail her cheeks, her jaw and then down her neck. And she gasped. Then their eyes met and locked in one another’s. She looked at him and the feelings she felt for him began to scare her. Before she knew it, his lips were on hers again, but this time she could only feel fear. She brought her hands between them and pushed him away.   N: Oh, God, I can’t do it, I’m sorry..   He looked at her in confusion. But when he saw the tears and the fear in her eyes he felt like an idiot.   B: Oh, Nora, I’m sorry, I didn’t think, I.. I was so insentient.. after all you’ve gone through, I should have thought before I... God, I’m so sorry.   She could see the pain in his eyes. The regret he felt. She knew he didn’t mean to hurt her. She knew he cared about her. And she could never compare him to that monster. He was everything she has ever wanted and it scared her to death.   N: Oh, Bo, it’s not that, it has nothing to do with what happened to me, to what he did to me. Oh, Bo, you are nothing like him. You are... you’ve always been gentle and soft with me, you cared about what I needed and wanted, you are nothing like him. He was a bastard that wanted revenge. He was brutally while you’ve always been tender. When I looked in his eyes I saw deep hatred and whenever we made love and I looked into yours I saw caring... I saw..   She paused. Her heart was pounding fast, almost to fast to bear. Her feelings were racing into her. The fear, the ache, the sadness, the desire, the pain, the craving for his heartbeats against hers, the yearning for his skin to touch hers. And then her tears began again.   B: What is it, Nora? If I didn’t scare you, why did you pull away? What did you see into my eyes?   N: I saw love.   B: But I don’t understand why you’re crying, I hate to see you cry; please tell me what’s wrong.   She looked at him deeply. She wanted to reach to him but she was deterred so she stayed still.   N: Because I saw love in them now too.   To be continued...