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The Last First Date   Nora is lying on her bed staring at the ceiling. She has hot packs under her back and neck and on her thighs and a cold cloth across her forehead.   He’s cute, I’ll give him that….but soooo much energy…. I can’t take much more. Pretending that I was up for a 50 mile bike ride….What was I thinking?? That’s 83.333 kilometers!!   Oh for the good old days of 5 minutes on the treadmill topped off with a reward of pizza or Chinese or Mexican… God I miss those days. Sushi??? If I have to look at one more measly piece of RAW fish on a square bed of rice (what does keep that rice together like that, crazy glue?)… I’m starting to feel like Flipper!   Heck, it takes all my energy to sit on a bench and watch Matthew play in the playground. I wasn’t made for hiking or jogging or biking. I’m an indoor kinda gal and proud of it. Give me a video, a good old fashioned video – Bogey and Bacall, or Tracey and Hepburn – now that’s entertainment! And dancing… now there’s exercise, and indoor to boot! Clean and dry and beautiful and romantic, with the right partner of course. And talking about the right partner, there’s definitely another indoor activity that I can think of that is most enjoyable.   He’s interested in taking this to the next stage…. Why aren’t I??? I mean it wouldn’t be awful, at least I don’t think it would be, but my Lord, I get exhausted just thinking about it!! Bedroom gymnastics, although an interesting thought, gives me this feeling of deja vu – hot packs and cold cloths…hummmmm!   I want the old tried and true. Slow and easy does it! A kiss, a touch, a deeper kiss, a ….oh you know what I mean, don’t you? Am I making sense or have I totally lost my mind?? But ya can’t help feeling what ya feel, now can you? Sex is sex and love is love and somehow the twain must meet!   Ok, settle down…this could not be good. I’ve never talked to the ceiling before. Shirley Valentine talked to her wall, then went to Greece and had and affair – maybe I’m turning into Shirley Valentine…. Greek God, here I come.   But I don’t need a Greek God, and I don’t need a stamp collecting, sushi eating biker. What I need is to get off this bed, take a hot shower and get my life back.   ***************** Ok, I’m here now what do I do? Slowly I walk, step by step…. Breathe in through one nostril and out the other. I feel faint or maybe it’s the vapours… do women still get the vapours? Oh Nora, get a grip.   And so I do – grip the doorknob that is and peek around the door. He’s there, and he’s alone and he’s staring at me… "Hi Bo" The End